Friday, July 15, 2011

The Socially Awkward Weight Loss Program

Lorraine: Apparently Lily and Bret aren't dead. This comes as a big surprise to me. I would've placed bets on the certainty of Lily drowning in a pool of vodka and Bret drowning in his own blubber. Alas, it is Bear and Wife who are most certainly dead.

No matter; we should start this post with good news. You last heard from me just over a month ago. I had ballooned back up to 148 and managed to get back down to 143. The good news is that I'm now at 139 pounds. I broke the 140 barrier.

All you other dead bloggers can eat it. And by "it," I mean whatever it is you eat that keeps you fat and gross.

I wish I had some concrete weight loss methods to share, but the truth is that my most recent success has more to do with my own timidity and social awkwardness. One component of shyness is that I hate eating in front of other people.  If I could bottle that and sell it to you guys, I totally would.

See, at my last job (Paper Folding USA) I mostly worked by myself in a corner cubicle that no one came into. When we started this blog, I discussed my third-grader eating habits- lots of refined sugar and artificial flavoring and working there didn't help my cause.

At PFA, sine I had little human interaction, I spent almost all of my lunches munching on zebra cakes or putting away trays of chocolate chip cookies, while I worked at my desk. Add to that cookies for breakfast and a skipped dinner, and you basically have my diet for the year and a half I was there.

Fast forward to my current situation, in which I am working a new (real) job that requires socialization. There is nowhere to hide my gross snacking habits. There is no way to avoid the lunch time human interaction. Everything changed and I was nearly forced into eating like a regular human being.

This probably sounds ridiculous. I know that it is.

Regardless, I did start to eat smaller portions. People made comments about how little I ate, what a small stomach I must have, and they wondered if I wasn't going to supersize or add a dessert. I answered no, no, no, more due to embarrassment than anything else. One month later, though, I've started to believe these things about myself: I can eat like a fully functioning adult, but I don't have to eat enough for 2 or 3 adults.

I guess that this was a valuable lesson to learn.

The skinniest I've ever been in my adult life was 138 and I am one pound away from it. It makes me absolutely giddy. Maybe if I jump around enough in (sexy) happiness I can shed that pound too.

My next goal is 135. I will be in Chicago in 35 days for the 20sb Summit and that is my deadline for this goal. Not at all because I want everyone to meet me when I'm unfluffy. (Yes.)

I'm not even sure this post made sense. For some reason, trying to convey that I've lost weight because I'm socializing was harder than I originally anticipated. No matter. The main point of the post was another four pound drop.

Coming up next time: My take on the couch to 5k program., which I've just started. I mean, if it doesn't kill me that is.

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